Bright futures

Influencing self

Yesterday I was so upset with a client that I was ready to tell them they are never going to move their team forward unless they change the way they think.

Later that evening I spent time with my best friend, and after telling her the story, she helped me understand two very important facts. First, I was letting my anger affect my thinking. Secondly, maybe I needed to reconsider the way I was approaching the situation.

We are emotionally reactive beings, but to be effective we need to consider the situation before reacting. We need to ask open ended questions and actively listen to fully understand a situation.

Today I sat down with the same client and asked questions that allowed me to understand why they made the decisions they did. I had to pause before answering and use affirmative phrases demonstrating I heard what they were saying. In the end, we were in a much better place.

I’m always reminded in these situations of a quote by John Maxwell. “The leader must make personal changes before asking others to change.” We must always strive to be a better person…and to always have friends around to help us get back on track too.

Thanks for reading. Have a great day!

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